Abbott died today.

At the corner of the drug store
Where we all would often meet, greet and bid good byes
Have been called, again this time
One of us has passed away
The dress code is black
The day seems so much in gloom
I pass by the kids in the park they call out
I always carry candy for them, we all did
Small town; the folks knew each other’s names
First middle and last
A utopian model, unbelievable

The town folk had gathered with the priest
He says things that seem so false
And he talks of a better place, some where the angels where tread
I refute such claims, usually, yet I let it pass this once
I can see his widow, she doesn’t weep
She sits there holding his hand, she hasn’t moved
Last night when Abbott went to bed
He gently slept, unsounding, and turned stiff
She looks at the priest and asks
‘has the lord left me alone, did he forget how my life was his breath’

The priest silenced by such a word
Looked up to the heavenly cloud
And then I could see the tear roll down his cheek
For laurel post that question had passed away
Together forever in life in death
They had fulfilled their solemn oath

I looked at my wife just then
She stopped her weeping, walked up to laurel
Kissed her forehead and prayed for her soul
Whilst the rest of us stilled in that moment
On of love inseparable even in death
She came over to me and held my hand
I wept this time for the love I felt
I told her ‘I shall follow you like laurel has’
But never die first like Abbott did

For I am afraid to let go of your hand
Let the lord take us both, but not one
And I went down to my knees after long
Held her hands and prayed
He bears witness , from the clouds above
A wish I make to thee, if ye send for her then send as well for me
Let us be in each other’s arms
breathe our last; in love’s symphony.

Tinkle.

There lay many, where the pieces fell before
Often i hear them crash, whilst a piece falls over another
The heart still cracking up, slowly, a fragment each time
Of glass made, that was shattered, into a million pieces,
One heart, mine
Now gone cold, lifeless, devoid of all feelings; save for pain
And of longing, the soul dreams of
Though the days pass like drifting clouds
The sun shines on those broken shards
Reflecting you,
Warm glow, flower beds and green fields
They are nothing, if not a taunt
Of reminiscent memories, some painful, salient

Revival

I am singing you a heartfelt song
Whilst the seagulls glide gracefully above
Will you be there when the morning comes?
And hold me when the moon shines
Will you hear the crickets, sitting on the park bench under the light?
And look into my eyes, just to find me dissolving into yours
And shall you rest your head against mine
While we share the time, saying nothing, while I hold you in my arms
Let me hold the book you read, turn the page as you need
Drink in the scent of your warmth, lying beside you
When you turn off the reading light let me hold your hand
And sleep with you in my arms, share and see the same dream
Go mad with you and play in the snow
Let me make a snow ball and hand it over
To throw it at me, so your hands don’t turn cold
Let me stir your coffee, while you stir it
Let’s sit like we did once eons ago
Let me hear you breathe, and feel that I breathe too
For this heart has learnt to miss again
And it weeps like a child to hold you

Maddened

They still play that song, down by the inn
Where we had coffee, and I drank
I was drunk in the moment with you
Filled up my heart in the melody of your voice
Whilst we discussed over things that never mattered
Neither to you nor to me, just to converse
Our glasses stood next to each other, like they wanted to dance
And I never asked if you wanted to, I apologize
Too shy to say I had two left feet
They guys still go crazy when they watch TV
When Knopfler sings ‘postcards from Paraguay’…
They sometimes raise a toast to that empty chair
Of the table I sit at, to let me feel that they see you too
I know they lie, for they don’t have my eyes
But lie in good spirit, would you come on by?
They ask sometimes when they meet me speaking to you
On the road, where we once took a stroll
Buddies;
They always cheer me up
And keep that bleed in check, some I see with tearful eyes
I know you are gone, but why do I still see you
Feel your presence,
In each flake of snow I see, each ray of sunlight that falls
Like an omnipotence, endless like the universe itself
And why do I walk on, talking to you, hearing you speak to me
In the rustling leaves, the gentle whistle of the wind
I may have been maddened, but I like it there
I keeps you with me

The life of The Nair

A million years, since we met
Since you snuggled up to me and gently wept
In happiness
When you were sad, afraid, I promised I won’t let go
The winter’s waning, the fog gentle as your touch
Has cast itself on me, still warm in thoughts
The morning glow, I remember distinct, your hair shimmered in
The pavement we walked along, together,
I see us walking each time I look
Each day has passed as thousand days..
And you still far away, if you look over the ledge do you see me?
Standing there, with flowers, awaiting you to run to me
Much time has passed indeed, and this heart now frail
The soul now on a broken leash
Was that you who just rang the chimes?
Was that you who called out my name?
Was that you who just passed by?
Truly a million years must’ve passed.
And this soul still survives
Maybe its journey is at end
Maybe it waits to catch a glimpse of you again
Playing amongst the daisies in my back yard
Gently blowing the dew drops away on mornings like these
You warmed a soul; it needs your warmth again
But I will wait another million years
Bask in your memories, and then silently fade
Like those wildflowers of my garden…

Meander.

 

The beautiful sky above, the flight of the swans gliding
the rays gentle touch their faces turning orange
in the morning glow
the mist , of the mangrove, so calming
painting faces of the many before me, as they gently sing in harmony
the trees green reach for the skies, the little birds tweet
harboring their nests, and the younglings chirp
as the river meanders, gently the fish swimming upstream
the river bed so clear and distinct
where a tortoise often drinks, while a butterfly rests on its nose
It fights but then again its just love, they do it forever
the cool waters lashing against my body
floating , my eyes open skywards
dead, the eyes still alive, in search of someone
as the world awakes,
the river carries me endlessly , on my final journey
to be one with the earth, blend in her
and let free of my dreams, wishes and longings
mixing me into nothingness…..

utterings of a prisoner

Talk to me, be there in those images I see
Touch my heart, make this time melt away
Look at me and say that you missed me
Whisper , gently as you do, let the winds carry your voice
They know their way,
If i was deaf i could feel them, if i was blind i could see them
You could wake up my long dead soul
You could bring down the walls of my fear of love, of smiling
I know not who you are, if you are God sent.
I know not why, and why for one forsaken so long ago
Let me follow you, eyes closed, bound to your essence
Feel your perfume guiding me, tugging me away
Far from the sorrows that keep me a prisoner
of my own self, of my own doings
free me, unlock this mind
Let this soul soar high again, let your love be the wind beneath its wings
and when I descend, and if it was my final flight
tell me you'll love me, you shall bring my soul back again.

empty

Where I once had love, now all it shelters is fear
Agonized by the ever present , omnipotent absence
The mind now a cavern, hollow, yet standing
Your thoughts flow constant, in gentle streams

There are times when the darkness haunts me
The darkness within, so empty so lone
It misses your touch, gentle; was a known term
Now the walls of this cavern are dry

Sometimes a raging river would run when you were aside
Would gently foam lashing against the seascape so serene
A seascape built of you and me, destroyed by the time’s symphony
Decays the soul that lives there, in that cavern

Summers, and winters have gone by, so have the rains
All drenched me, except my soul
For the faux pas of fear, of a heart, an engraved memory
Kept the cave out of reach, untended

When the day beckons, I am one with the devices that tie me
When its eve I sit and gaze at the skies
I sometimes try to smile, but laugh in my sadness
Each time the cavern mocks at me.

Purge

Ravage my soul
let me lose control
find you in my mind, erase it
Purge my thoughts
Feed this blind brain thought
Equalize what once was High
get my head out of the clouds
rip my heart to shreds
And when all is done
sew me together and leave me, again
Maybe then I shall write again.

Deep within my self
I have concealed your thoughts
Wicked and sacrilege, of lust and desertion
You can see the fight in my eyes
if you look into them, your innocence breeds my craving
of you, a mere possession , mere flesh
I shall not be the one, who shall soothe your hurt
Nor shall I be the one you have waited for
I am only a speck, blowing in the wind
tomorrow I may be gone

Knowing this would you just breathe easy
and extend your hand, surrender your self to me
be in pain, exist so forever there on
for a moment of oneness with you?
I would have if I was you and you were me.
I wont ask for an answer for you are not me.
I depart now.