I have to leave soon
The sun calls me, as it sets distant,
I seek no assurance of its return, its wish is its own
I seek no arrangements, I am now awake,, free of desires
I shall never be what I don’t wish to be
Its I now, the ‘ Us’ was destroyed when you put your wish over mine|
I held you as a flame to the wick
you burnt me, I am now no longer what I was
I give up on you , no longer are you dear
I was broken before, though at the hands of others
the knife this time is held by you
I can only bid my time
then run away from you, and rest beneath those trees
and watch the paddy grow
sitting alone, at the epitome of joy without you and your wishes
Seek no more
I often bask in the thought
Is it that there is no self left in me
have I given it up to a mortal being who wants her way
Shall I now believe and know that my end has arrived.r
Should I give up all that I cherish for her,
And then look into the self, now an emptiness
What shall I now believe
Should I say that I gave up the freedom, and chose slavery
of the woman who wants her life to be complete
thereby causing destruction to me, to all that I stand for
Would it matter to her, if she knows her wants stand to destroy
To crush to dust the very basis of our togetherness
Should I now run away, leave her for ever
Would it matter to her? and if it did would it to me?
Some questions I ponder upon, and then I exclaim
I am the alpha and omega of my creation
I shall build what I wish and then destroy what I don’t
Someday I know the day shall come
I shall be gone, leave her to her wants and desires
I no more exist as ‘Her’ in my soul
In between
All that remains must fade
Like the mist that shall covers the night fades
Vanishes , as it never was
And then we think, is this what it was meant to be
I beg to differ in this thought
Choices were made, all else given up
And then some of us gave up the self
Now when I walk among, all I see are the bodies
Soulless, bound to what the desires bind them
No escape
I eye the race I am among, I seem to be unmoved
These are not mine, nor do I wish
Want, think for or even about
I still walk here, the earth beneath the feet
Until I sleep alone, in it.
Talking in titles
In white shall emerge, I of all known evil beings
look inside, what do you see, the hidden me
I am present when you do good, and do i exist when you do bad
Do you think to avoid my thought? do you feel me gnawing
At your soul, at your life, eating you inside out till I am all that remains
I am in the first light of dawn that you see
In the last streak of the sun, i the still of the dusk and twilight
I am that omnipresent one, I cannot be erased
I am not a thought you can forget, nor a nightmare you can wake up from
I am what you don't want me to be, yet I am what completes you
I shall consume you, in fear or in the respect of knowing me
I have patience, forever is just a moment for me
I have been there when you were born, when you smiled
Bidding my time, I have been there when you first took your steps
The first fright that you had , the first lover you kissed
I have been in your eyes, in your breath
I am in the joy, I am in the sorrow, In love and hate
I am your end and the beginnings of other
I am death, the stillness that none can match
You cannot embrace me at your will, nor can you hide from me
You have to come along at my calling
I am the alpha and the omega of destiny
Your time is coming, await me
Resting
Hold my hand, run with me a while
On these open fields that have reminded me of you
The mist, the wind, all that is now solemn post your arrival
It kept your memories alive,of my hidden feelings and my unsaid
Lets sit by the brook, let me how the water glows
glowing golden, as the light falls on your hair
and listen to its mystic flow
making a sound that speaks of you, as it has spoken forever
Lets roam around the vast hills, float into the waterfall
watch the birds in formation, heading into the setting sun
let me smile once, let me smile knowing it
Let me Fade into the mist this time as you would
every night that I have dreamt.
come visit me on the soil that i lay beneath
watch the plants grow, see the flowers they bear for you
pick anyone and wear one
I will think I have lived forever then.
Adrift
The darkness sees the light, follows it,
The water sees the earth, mixes with it
I saw my soul float adrift
wishing to dwell in someone’s light
The darkness had consumed me
The water washed away my feelings,
With only pain left,but it still had hope’s company
I knew I had to walk on and wait
The fire of my soul burnt bright in your thoughts
In the now of my existence all is reason
Your place exists, yet locked away
In the deepest corners of my existence
I wish to be you, I wish to know
What it feels to float on forever
Like a thought
Exist once as the fire of my soul
Renew
Some old fires burn again, though ash, ever so bright
melt away the years of solitude that the mind has felt
It feels just as it has felt awaiting and contemplating how it should
the silence has been broken by another wave of silence.
I stand between these waves, which torments my willful exit
of the feelings and meanings that bound me, ball and chain
they call unto me again.
how could you know, hear me sing songs of loneliness
and speaking to your mirage in the heart of my soul
of all that has kept me awake, i blamed work, it was you
my self that was lost, long ago, has now returned
It stares me in the face, asks me some gravest of questions,
sarcastic at best;
Would it be you,is that you, are you the same, ?
the one i have dreamt of from the day our paths crossed!
or have I dreamt of you again,
Rinse, Repeat
Lets part , go our ways, grow over ourselves
Find ways to evolve into the self, contained in the form called us
Bitten into by each other’s reality, existence and thoughts
Lets exit, you take the left i take the right
Maybe when we are alone we may know
Feel the summer heat, misery of its harshness|
Parch our throat and quench the thirst by our own hand
Let the hermit know that he is not the only one
Tell him he is among us common
See the evening sun set, stand alone, long for company
Maybe wish to hold a hand and see if it needs to be
If not then lets see more reality, and let go of the mockery
See the moon slip into the night sky
If you see me walk by , look at me and smile
Like two complete strangers who have known each other
And then if you feel that you need me, see if I need you as much
There will be no need to ask, we will know
We shall then meet again, same old place
You bring the food, I will carry the wine
Lets be surrounded by those, our friends and enemies we were among
And then lets eat and drink like we did last time, then,
In the same glass, pan and plate
Like this lets shampoo and cleanse our bond
Rinse, repeat
